Dressed for DIY

Today, being Sunday, Husband is home all day. (Saturday is a day of work for him). Sundays, as a result, are a day of work for the rest of us: we are all chivvied into busy-ness by His Nibs who can’t sit still for two minutes.

Today we began to hang our pictures. We have collected dozens in the twenty years we have been together. Some we ought not to have bothered to hang onto but I’m not good at throwing anything away and consequently our rubbish has followed us around Tanzania like a bad smell.

Anyway. Picture Hanging. Having unpacked them from bubble wrap I set about deciding which picture was to go in what room. Husband followed me about armed with hammer and nails and rather bored expression wishing he’d never suggested hanging pictures in the first place.

This is how we hang pictures: once I have decided precisely where which picture should go and with which other (like my life, I quite like my walls to be cluttered), Husband – having done that whole ‘up a bit, down a bit, left a bit’ nonsense puts his thumb behind the frame to identify roughly where the nail should go by holding the picture wire. It’s all en exercise in guess work and – as you can imagine – the pictures rarely end up exactly where I’d hoped. Then he yells, ‘take the picture, take the picture, take the bloody picture before I drop it’, which I do, reminding him there’s no need to shout, all the while he’s got thumb pressed to wall at point he thinks nail ought to be in order for my picture to hang somewhere near the point I’d like it to hang.

And then he whacks nail into the wall with all his might, and absolutely no ceremony.  No raw plugs or spirit levels or drill bit for us. Oh no, we’re far too good for that.

Considering our Heath Robinson approach and fact there were absolutely no electrical gadgets involved, I have to say I was quite suprised to note Husband wearing ridiculous yellow DIY goggles for the job. Mind you, I did see sparks – not to mention several kilos of plaster – fly every time he struck the wall with his hammer. Perhaps it was as well he was protecting his eyes.

Even if he did look bloody silly.

4 Responses to “Dressed for DIY”

  1. Afromusing Says:

    this is my first time on your blog..hilarious!! I just have my pictures on the floor for now…i’d better get started hanging them. This post made my day! LOL.

  2. reluctantmemsahib Says:

    Thanks Afromusing, glad I made you laugh. Most of my pictures are now on walls. Not precisely where I wanted them. Think those goggles might have interefered with Mr Fixit’s vision?

  3. The Good Woman Says:

    Don’t think my Good Man has ever hung a picture in his ife. Maybe I should get him some goggles…

  4. Carolyn Says:

    You so should have taken a photo of that one, you could have even got him to nail it to the wall!

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