Resolutions

 

resolutions

The tide rose high last night. High. So that the necklace of seaweed that strung the beach yesterday is pushed further up the white throat of sand this morning. Amber. The weed is beaded with small seeds that burst with a satisfying pop between fingers when pressed. We spent hours as kids, popping those bubbles.

And the high water has wiped the beach clean of all our footsteps. A new slate. No longer evidence of midnight cricket balls bowled or paths trodden to where the low, low tide tenderly stroked the sand, no weaving routes to the sea to tell meandering tell tales of too much wine drunk. Not even the tiniest tip toe of the ghost craps that rushed hither and thither, scuttling sideways between newly dug homes.

I think of clean pages when I look at the beach. Clean pages flattened with the palm of a hand as I ponder what to write and suck the end of my virtual pen. Clean pages and new leaves.

Over dinner the children (can I still call them that, for my little Hat is taller than I and almost twenty?) ask what was best about 2016 and what of aspirations and resolutions for 2017.

I will write a little every day, I say, that will be my resolution for the New Year I tell them. For it is easy to forget how to craft words unless you do it often: writing is like tennis. Practice improves. And logging the days seems important. Promising myself to pin them to a page in the ether daily means I will observe a discipline that I lose when writing a diary by hand; my 2016 paper journal is illegible towards the end of the y ear, green or blue or black or red biro (whatever it was I could find to hand) scrawls untidily, as if a spider whose lost a leg or two and gained a bottle of gin were has been let loose to scribble her thoughts. A spider who desperately tries to claw the memories of the 8th of the month on the 25th.

So a blog makes for a discipline and helpful legibility so that come this day in 2018 I can cast my eyes and mind back and know whether we kept those resolutions, attained accomplishments we’d promised ourselves we would.

And so I flatten this virtual sheet and type the date, 1st January 2017 and I wonder what the year will bring.

365

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9 Responses to “Resolutions”

  1. Shelley Says:

    I was so pleased to see your post in my Inbox. Although we’ve never met or corresponded, I’ve followed your blog for years…I love the way your words transport me from suburban Oregon to your life in Africa. Happy New Year from the other side of the world!
    Blessings,
    Shelley

  2. Rosie Says:

    Nice to have you back. I’ve missed your lovely words. Looking forward to many more this year.

  3. Ellie Says:

    Oh hooray. Am so pleased to see a post and read that you hope to write regularly once more. I’ve read your blog for years, so this was a happy post for me to read today 🙂

    Happy New Year!

  4. Ad dy Says:

    Happy New Year. Look forward to reading your daily posts!

  5. iotamanhattan Says:

    Happy New Year. I look forward to reading!

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